Miracles do Happen..... It happened to me....

A year and a half today, i went back to my blog. Never have posted anything since i cannot remember when. Then i saw this unfinished post, it was about my Dad's Miracle. A colleague wanted me to write about it coz we cried when i told them the story and to give hope to those who need it and to let readers know that miracles do happen... I forgot about it until now...

So, I am posting it now.. the part 1 of it.. This gave me reason to blog again...


God Makes Miracles Happen thru His Angels

Just this year, my family have been a witness to so many miracles from Him. My dad was diagnosed by a 3 vessel coronary artery disease and he badly needed a Triple heart bypass.

July last year, my dad experienced severe chest pain at home, alone. At around 11pm, alone in our house in Matusalem,Roxas Isabela, he suddenly felt a heavy chest and cant move due to pain. He was alone because my mom was with my family here in Manila. They sacrificed being apart to help their kids. Dad dont want to leave his "bukid" since this is their primary source of income as retired senior citizens.

That episode happened twice that month. My dad normally dont want to go to the doctor but when he ask mom to accompany him to the doctor, we knew it was serious...

August to December was a series of check-ups, laboratory and maintenance medication. But despite being monitored by his internal doctor, he still felt pain even during late hours of night. We would be awaken by the lights in their room in late in the night. Dad is restless due to chest pain and mom is worried.

Finally, his internist advised that he undergo Angiogram, it is an xray of the heart that will confirm suspected blockages in his heart.

His angiogram showed 3 major artery that are 100% disfunctional. The left xray showed the normal blood flow, while the right showed my dad's xray. Even if i am not a "medical" person, i can see that there's a problem... 

Immediately after the angiogram, the cardo doctor who did the procedure talked to us and this is when we knew he has 3 vessel coronary artery disease and he needs Coronary Artery Bypass Grafting or simply Heart Bypass or CABG (medical term).

The next logical question was How Much? And the doctor told us the procedure is worth P750,000.00. Our shoulders and jaws dropped all at the same time....
But the doctor said procedures like this can be applied with Philhealth, and we could apply for Philhealth's Z benefit program where in they will shoulder P550K of the procedure. We had hope.

On the next checkup, the doctor explain how can we avail of the Z benefit program. We had papers to sign,laboratory procedures to repeat and clearances to acquire. It was a long list of  to-dos but its the only option we know we can do. So step 1 was to acquire all all documents to fill, 2nd is to be oriented on the procedure.
During step 2, we received the bad news, so bad, it shattered all our hearts into pieces... The Philhealth personel checked the requirements that we have, she saw our 2D echo results and i could see in her face "Bad News" tattooed over her forehead. I could feel it.
She went inside, we waited outside the waiting area, minutes after, we saw our cardiologist rushing inside where the girl was. I felt something bad is going to happen...

Then our cardiologist went out of the door, in his hands were all our papers and folders, went straight to us and delivered the news.... "Hindi po tayo nakapasa sa Z-benefit" was all i could ingest from his words.

Apparently, Philhealth only allowed "Standard-Risk" patients into the program. Dad was "HIGH-RISK". His 2D Echo indicated that a portion is heart is already not moving, similar to a wound scar tissue, this was due to the limited supply of oxygen/blood to the left portion of the heart.

So..
High risk case -- needed by-pass immediately -- no P700k on hand...
... it was like the world fell on our shoulders, blood left our faces kind of a reaction...
i dont want to look at the faces of my parents , we were all devastated...
..i felt pressured at that moment, i need to think of how to give them hope in this trying desperate time..

I returned to our doctor's office the next day, determined to find other options to our situation.
He offered me to avail of the Phil Heart Center package for CABG for P700K  as a private patient. If i am going to avail of the package, i have to make a 50% down payment before they do the procedure.

But still we don't have even P350K???? Is that an option??? OMG!!! My mind panicked...

I didn't know how i switched the conversation around, but i told him straight-face, sincerely, i think with a little teary eyed, "Doc, wala kaming ganyang pera..."

I would like to believe that he genuinely would like to help, because he started to write down doctor endorsement in five pages. And with her secretary advised that i could reach out to different agencies and politician thru this letter.

So that's the plan, i will solicit help from agencies, politicians and who ever is willing to help, and i will return to him when i have P350K... then that's the only time we can have the operation...

Gosh!!

I cannot contain in me the devastation,  the heart-breaking news... i have to let it out... I cant tell my parents i cant do it.  As the "Äte" of the family, i was pressured to make this happen..


Due to desperation, i succumb myself to pressure and vent out my frustrations in FB. I cant help but be frustrated with how can't the government provide free medical service to us, tax payers.  I also felt helpless at the moment for not preparing well for this moment financially.

I prayed and prayed for wisdom.

Prayed hard...


.. to be continued..

A year later

1am in the morning of January 6, i woke up, and couldn't get back to sleep, so tried fb--boring... and then a familiar feeling enveloped me...

I began typing momyjorayma on the browser address and suddenly remembered i had a blog.

Almost a year ago was my last blog post, so sad actually... And so i realize, i needed to write something..

Something that is bothering me, but i cant make anything out of it...

Maybe because of the previous happenings ...

I had a date with my dad, right after we send off my mom and nieces to the bus station, my dad and i decided to stroll the city...

And we had little chats in between..

He mentioned his take on what's happening to him in the province, my mom's personal challenges and some other stuff...

And then we went home...

And then suddenly, all those little details enveloped me, i felt a sudden sadness in me... I wanted to take away their hurt and make their life easy...

That's it! I feel i am responsible for their misery.. and i dont know who to make it better...

I have been so very busy with my own life, that i have forgetten to take care of them. Time really passess by so fast and i felt time is slowly taking their good health and i cannot do anything about it...

And i told myself, nobody can better this situation but me...

I love them, and i will do everything i can to make their life better... starting now...

Lord God, the Giver of these lives we are living, may you please give my parents more years to live. Please use me as your instrument of making their lives better. Give me the strength to be their support, in times that they need it. And give me the wisdom that i may know what to do at times that we are challenged..

Life is not easy, i know, but with You on my side, there's nothing i can't handle. Amen.

The Year That Was 2012

2012 was a challenging year for me...

i wasn't even sure if i want relive and blog it, but doin' it would mean i am over it and i have to move on...

it was a year of new hope, but then again, it disappeared...
it was a year where i gained new profession, yet still no accomplishments...
it was a year of trials that i thought would never stop...

As i do every start of the new year, i have to evaluate all aspects of my 2012 and move from there... After a month that i only realized that i am ready to do this...

Let's see how i did...

Spiritualy -- it was challenging. I was thrown in the face with may challenges that questioned by very core. There are times that i myself questioned the reasons why life is given and yet to be taken away... When i was given hope, it has to be taken away...

But through the lost of my child, my faith was strengthen... And after the long list of questions, i began to realize that all that had happened was for the good.  However painful, until now, lessons have been learned. I just have to accept that i have learned it the hardest way...

Physically -- No good. I have gained double digit pounds. I can't even look at myself in the mirror. I honestly look like a manang with match bulging tummy. All i needed was to be in a "daster" and i am all set.

Because of my emergency cesarian and apendectomy, i am not advise to perform any strenuous activities. And as my natural slow metabolism and love to eat, i gained weight, Unfortunately. My only consolation are my 2 boys enjoyed playing with my tummy and it makes them smile.. they might have thought that i have eaten na very large gelatin and it stayed on mama's tummy...

Emotionally -- Insane. The many downs made me so vulnerable to any situation. I cry to a very lame scene on my TV. I can easily look at something and cry. I can never count how many sleepless nights i have and was just crying. I feel i am loosing sanity. Am i?

Intellectually -- Last year, i have gained knowledge on how i can be a Financial Advisor. I learned about insurance and mutual funds.

And also i realized, that being a programmer and a financial adviser doesn't go together. The busy schedule of a programmer didn't gave me enough time to talk to clients and meet my quota...So i guess, in the long run, i have to choose what i love the most... not yet anyway...

Sexually - Satisfied. Period.

Financially -- Still Challenging.Our obligations for our new house started this year and we have to adjust and religiously stick to our budget, if we want to stay together...

It's hard to realize that you know where to put your money for investment, yet you have no money to invest. So still, i continue to dream and dream until i am able to start...

Hoping and praying to be in good financial standing by end of next year...



If i have to grade and sum up my 2012, it's not a good year... We were bombarded by so may trials, we were working like cows yet savings are minimal.. It was our all-time low...yet we are still standing up and facing life as it come... hoping and really really praying hard that the next year would be a better one...

Godspeed!

How I Can be a Legend, like Ray-ban.

I am way way below Ms. Cheyser Pedregosa  of  www.thewalkingrecessionista.com. I am but a simple woman. Who want simple life. But is dreaming BIG big time.


I want to spread LOVE LOVE LOVE all over to whoever needs it. Because i believe, LOVE is all that matters in this world.


Like Ray-ban, this is how i am gonna be a legend. On my own doin' and actions. In my own time.


Simple yet Legendary.


(Post inspired by http://www.thewalkingrecessionista.com/2012/11/twr-x-ray-ban-legends-giveaway.html)

Keep dreamin'

If i Will be Given a Super Power, What will it Be?

November 9, 2012, during a training that i attended, we were tasked to answer this question : If given a super power, what will it be? And my thoughts were....

Last November 4, during the church mass our parish priest shared a story about John. During his journey as a desciple, John was asked: "If all books in the world would be burned, what should be saved?" John said, The Bible, of course.

"What if The Bible was also burned, What part in the bible would you save?" John answerd "The book of John".

"If the book of  John will also be burned, What chapter would you save?" John answered "Chapter 3!".

"If the chapter 3 also burned, What verse would you save?" John answered: "John Chapter 3 Verse 16: For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

"If John Chapter 3, Verse 16 would also be burned, What word will you save?" John answered: "LOVE. FOR IT WAS ALL THAT WE NEED."

And i nodded in agreement... Wouldn't you??!  If the world would have been all LOVE, the world would have been a beautiful world...

So, if i am given a super power, it will not to be invinsible or to have a super strength, but the SUPER POWER TO GIVE LOVE TO EVERYONE and that's it!, life would be beautiful to be lived. I would remove all the negativity in this world and just spread LOVE... it is really ALL THAT WE NEED.

God speed!

Secrets To A Lasting Marriage

Excerpt from
By Yahoo! Special Projects | Fabulous Mom – Mon, Feb 13, 2012 10:58 AM PHT


By Pierra Calasanz-Labrador for Yahoo! Southeast Asia

 A day after Valentine's day, this post was in my Yahoo! News, and i definitely agree on it's content... So, i am reposting, hoping to share my own experiences related to this post. Maybe somebody can be enlightened...

My hubby and I are only married 7 years, but our marriage has been tested by all kinds of marital issues, and i'm proud to say, that we have conquered them all. However, still afraid of issues to come, but with constant learning and loving... i believe we can conquer them all.

You vowed to love each other for better or for worse, till death do you part…but how do you keep these promises from sounding like a death sentence when the honeymoon is over?

Happily married couples often share that the secret to their longevity is treating their spouse as their lover as well as their best friend. For a professional perspective on making relationships go the distance, we chatted with Pilar Tolentino, Executive Director of Center for Family Ministries (CEFAM).

Be pro-active about your issues
Gone are the days when couples counseling meant you were headed for splitsville. Instead of being confused by conflicting unsolicited advice, many modern couples seek professional or spiritual guidance from a neutral third party. Tolentino shares: "There are different reasons couples come to counseling: the need for clarification on certain issues like parenting, roles and expectations; because of a current crisis like accidents, death, or financials; or to find healing like in cases of infidelity. A common factor is to seek assistance in understanding, accepting, and healing a current situation that is causing pain or confusion in the relationship."

May 2009, when we humbly seek the support of parents and attended a Marriage Encounter Weekend. That time i was kicking him out of the house and wanted separation, then i saw a post from a Forum about it and tried it. Hoping for 2nd chance for our marriage. Even if i was so angry at him, i still gave our marriage a 2nd chance. And true enough, these people are still our support group. We were able to share our problems with them, without them judging us, and guide us through their advises and support. It was not a bad decision to seek support, to open to those who knows better, even our parents are good support groups however based on experience, its very hard to open up to them because you dont want them seeing you on your lowest point.

So go, find your own support group, even at the moment, you dont have marital issues at hand. Most of the time, God will send his Love thru these people....




The element of surprise
Every so often, do something unexpected to keep the passion alive. Says Tolentino, "Simple thoughtful acts—like surprise visit to his/her office for a lunch date, love-notes, weekend getaways, cooking special meals, giving gifts even when there's no occasion, a soothing massage—can add flavor to daily routines as a couple."

My hubby dont shower me with gifts, because we agreed to keep it simple. We are both mountaineers and from that we learned to live with what we have and what is only essential. But, with this kind of lifestyle, we learn to appreciate the simplest things that we do for each other. A simple coffee time shared on saturday mornings... Sunday Lunch with the family... Hubby fetching me from the office... A walk around the neighborhood... A once in a while movie date...All this simple things, when remembered are very special and touching..

Put your partner before your pride
Instead of playing the blame game, put yourself in your spouse's shoes and see the situation from his point of view. Review your Corinthians 1:13. "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs."

In one homily that i attended, the priest sermoned about how married couple should set aside pride..Without asking who pays the bills, or who gives the bigger income to the marriage or who's more correct.. that time i was already contemplating on sending hubby abroad because he's not giving enough, but this made me realize, there are things that he do that compensate his shortcomings..i maybe the biggest contributor financially, but most of the time i dont have time to do things that a mother/wife should be doing because of work... and i realized our marriage worked because we compensate each other, so why ruin this situation when we can work together to make our marriage better....

Cool off before saying something hurtful
Newlyweds are always advised to "never let the sun set on an argument," but when you're boiling mad, someone's definitely sleeping on the couch. Tolentino shares, "It's probably not literally 'sleeping angry,' but do not let an argument go unresolved. Dialogue when each of you has cooled down. If an agreement is not yet possible at that point, at least acknowledge and respect the spouse's feelings. Seek assistance, like counseling, if this will help." Sometimes, it's the seemingly innocuous little arguments that can snowball into one big disaster. Tolentino says: "Breakdown of marriages usually happens when 'minor' conflicts are not addressed. These 'minor' problems can build up negative emotions."

In one of our marital fights, i tend to bring out again older issues, and these brings out previous hurt. Sometimes i forgot that we already resolved these issues and argue on it again... and it brings out the same hurt again... Sometimes, its better to forget these things from the past and just remember the good memories... when u matture you begin the master the art of understanding your husband and instead, focus on your life ahead

Don't assume your partner is a mind-reader
Many people don't know how to express their feelings, or worse, expect that their partner should know what they want. "It is important that openness and communication is encouraged in the relationship. Set aside time for just the two of you at least once a week. Give your spouse your full attention; listen without judgment. Remember that communication is two-way."

Hayyy... this is one thing i always forget.. Minsan,i am so stressed with things about the house, financials or stressed that i cry at night, i felt alone in facing our family problems and issues... And then i get mad at my husband for not helping me ... But when the anger subsides, i will realize that he will never understand because he really has no idea what im going through unless i tell him... So, i lessen the time to be a drama queen and practiced how to be open with him...

Show your appreciation daily
A marriage's silent enemy is being taken for granted. Don't wait till bitterness sets in before you try to "bring back that loving feeling." Everyday, pay your spouse a sincere compliment, show your gratitude, and express your affection. "Remember the things you value about your marriage and the good traits of your spouse. This will help reaffirm your commitment and strengthen you in facing the challenges that may come your way. Make an effort to make your spouse feel important, appreciated, and loved. Love has to be expressed."

My hubby and I dont practice telling each other i love you's and i miss you's. So minsan, when i am upset or stressed saying these things can lessen the negative feelings... When we make love, he tells me to caress him more or ask me to tell him i love him and it give me the feeling that he needs me pala to tell this things and so when im in the mood, i make him feel that way..and most of the time, it gives me a good feeling kasi no negative vibes between us.


Grow (old) together
Getting married doesn't mean giving up your individuality. When you're in a relationship that allows for personal growth, you each bring something to the relationship. Tolentino puts it this way: "One main element in a happy marriage are two happy individuals. Each one must give importance to the well-being of the other. Each one must be supported, respected, affirmed, appreciated and loved."  However, don't forget to enjoy shared activities as well, so that you grow together.

 Sometimes, when you are at your senti moment, naiisip mo, baket ba sya yung binigay sayo ni Lord... and when you ask your self these questions, you will get your answer... You will realize that your partner compliments you.. and completes you.. and then you'll realize, you want to grow old with him. 

The advice Tolentino dishes most often is this: "Remember that you are partners. Appreciate each one's contribution in strengthening the relationship, respect each other as equal, look out for the well-being of the other as you would for yourself." Bottomline: with love, affection, laughter, faith, limitless patience and mutual respect, your relationship can deepen after the honeymoon and you can look forward to living happily EVEN after.

Contact CEFAM at phone +63 2 4264289 — 92, email <cefam_ed@yahoo.com.ph> or <www.cefam.ph>.

The Word of the Lord this October 14, 2012

8am, went to church with the family.....

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of God"

The priest started his homily by asking the church "Sinong mahirap dito?" and almost all raised their hands including me, without hesitation.

And then my youngest son Kenneth, asked me "Mayaman ba tayo mama?" and i honestly dont know what to answer, but i nodded to a Yes.

And i listened on... and some part of the sermon that i remember that made me realized, I am not poor.. and i am not rich either.... i realized that I am BLESSED....everyday of my life...

The only poor people are those that eat once a day or sometimes not at all... While me and my family eats 5 times a day, sometimes 7 with midnight snack and early coffee morning  included..

The only poor people are those who have no home to shelter them... While me and my family has 2 houses, one where we stay and the other we rented out for additional income...

The only poor people are those alone, with no body to share or take care of them.. While i am well taken care of by my husband and i have a beautiful family close to me...

When the priest told this poor conditions, that i am not in, he told me, those who raised their hands when he asked if "Sinong Mahirap?" were hipocrites... me included....

And at the back of my mind, it made me realized... "OO nga no..." Napakaraming blessings na binigay skin ni Lord, pero ang nasa isip ko ay Mahirap pa rin ako...

Walking home, i realized, i have to treasure all the blessings that is being given to me... I may not have a grand house, but i still have a house that i can call home and a family that gives me happiness bar none.

Indeed... I am BLESSED...

Holy Gospel of Jesus Christ according to Saint Mark 10:17-30.
As Jesus was setting out on a journey, a man ran up, knelt down before him, and asked him, «Good teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?»
Jesus answered him, "Why do you call me good? No one is good but God alone.
You know the commandments: 'You shall not kill; you shall not commit adultery; you shall not steal; you shall not bear false witness; you shall not defraud; honor your father and your mother.'"
He replied and said to him, "Teacher, all of these I have observed from my youth."
Jesus, looking at him, loved him and said to him, "You are lacking in one thing. Go, sell what you have, and give to (the) poor and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me."
At that statement his face fell, and he went away sad, for he had many possessions.
Jesus looked around and said to his disciples, "How hard it is for those who have wealth to enter the kingdom of God!"
The disciples were amazed at his words. So Jesus again said to them in reply, "Children, how hard it is to enter the kingdom of God!
It is easier for a camel to pass through (the) eye of (a) needle than for one who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."
They were exceedingly astonished and said among themselves, "Then who can be saved?"
Jesus looked at them and said, "For human beings it is impossible, but not for God. All things are possible for God."
Peter began to say to him, "We have given up everything and followed you."
Jesus said, "Amen, I say to you, there is no one who has given up house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands for my sake and for the sake of the gospel
who will not receive a hundred times more now in this present age: houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and lands, with persecutions, and eternal life in the age to come.